Column: March 2018

Diary: February 2018

4 February 2018, London

A makeshift Golden Lane/Peabody/Barbican quiz team came last in Pete's Sunday-night quiz upstairs in the Artillery Arms, with a score of 42. They were beaten by, among others, a stellar performance from a mixed-gender team called We Put The Men In Menstrual. The theme of the quiz was sport, and not knowing the colours of the rings on an archery board and that the longest-ever rally in table tennis was 9-hours-something-or-other was a heavy burden to carry. Apologies. The theme for next week's quiz, says Pete, is WOMEN. Sunday, 7.30pm. Artillery Arms, Bunhill Row, etc. 20 February 2018, Liverppol Into University is a charity, started by J's cousin Rachel, that supports young people from disadvantaged backgrounds in getting a place at university. They run after school classes and mentoring projects in many centres around London. They also have branches nationwide. They recently opened one in Anfield, Liverpool, where I was born. The project is a partnership between IU, Liverpool University and LFC Foundation, the charity arm of Liverpool Football Club.The event’s evening reception  took place at Liverpool FC’s Anfield stadium, and I was lucky enough to get an invite. On the train north, I had my first encounter with a talking toilet. As soon as you lock the door a jolly-sounding woman tells you politely what not to do with sanitary products and nappies. She sounded like she really loved her job (“I knew what I was getting into when I became a toilet,” she says), but I did get the unnerving sense that I was being watched. At the day reception we heard speeches from staff and students. Then Liverpool goalie Simon Mignolet told us how he studied political science at university in Belgium. The IU approach is for a goal-centred programme of academic support, creating an enriched nurturing environment for dedicated pupils to do homework, to study and to follow their dreams. The ethos was right there to see when we arrived. The walls of the reception room were covered with photographs of the young students holding signs stating their professional ambitions. Many wanted to be teachers. Nearly the same number wanted to be footballers. One, Ethan, said he wanted to become a spy. Beneath the word SPY he had written “don't tell anyone”. The same theme was played out for visitors with a Flipboard asking the question, “What did you want to be when you were growing up?” Again, teachers and footballers were the desired occupations, though one or two curious alternatives appeared. One said, “pub landlord” and another, “high level drugs enforcement officer”. I put “marine biologist”.

25 February, 2018, Botley, Hampshire Someone has tied up their horse to a post outside Halfords.